The rollercoaster

“You’re going to have moments like this and then in a moment, it changes.”
(Grandma, aged 88, 24 September 2020)

When someone takes up your time and emotional energy, they also become what drains you. You can willingly give this energy, and you do, to the people you love, but with that love and giving you must find time and space for yourself.

You must not lose yourself or who you are and most importantly do not lose control of your own life. Understand, love and be compassionate, know that when a person you love does not treat you in a way you would expect, often it is not due to you or something you have done but it is in fact (and most likely) due to something from their past or in their life that they are trying to deal with, or refuse to deal with. They may not even know that it exists.

You can be there for them, but if they don’t want you to be, you may have to walk away for a while, that while may also be forever. Whatever that person is fighting, to get over it and find peace, strength and love in themselves they must face their demons on their own.

You may have to walk away for a while, that while may also be forever.

@tozandothersaltywords

Do not think you should have done more when you have done all you can to try and help them, be there for them and understand them. Once you have gone through all of that, the hardest part is then to let go, to sever that bond. To acknowledge the reality and truly feel like you can let go, with all of you.

Do not wait for the call, the message, the email. Realise and know that if a person wants to be in your life, they will put themselves in it. You can’t control people and what you think they need may not be what they think they need or what they want.

Realise and know that if a person wants to be in your life, they will put themselves in it.

@tozandothersaltywords

So with all the hurt you may feel from it, the lows and the aching, the need to scream, cry, shout, sing and laugh.
Do them all!
Embrace them all!
Feel everything from lost and alone, to bright eyed and bushy tailed. Ride that rollercoaster and take the downs where you question yourself and choices you made. Scream and laugh in the highs where you see the entire horizon and it is as if everything in life looks so perfect and all problems seem so small in that moment way up high.

Wherever you lie in any moment on that rollercoaster never stop loving you. Be who you are and know there is no wrong or right, just a serious of moments, actions and ways forward for life.

@tozandothersaltywords