Tag: lost

Prison of Love #2

I found myself getting lost again.
Not because of a person or people, but because of me.
I found myself squaring up to the hardest trait to be angry with
giving, helping and loving too much.

I’d given too much to too many,
In so doing,
I had walked a little too far from myself.
I was there burning again,
trapped in the prison of my own decisions.

“I was there burning again,
trapped in the prison of my own decisions.”

@tozandothersaltywords

I’d forgotten to keep loving me
To keep myself safe.
And I was at breaking point
nostril above water, struggling to find a way back to myself that wouldn’t cause a collosal explosion.

“…nostril above water, struggling to find a way back to myself that wouldn’t cause a collosal explosion.”

@tozandothersaltywords

And as I stared hard at my reflection,
got angry, screamed and cried once more,
I remembered all the things I need to make me me.
And I had not done one of them in months.

I had to sit with myself, breathe deeply into myself
ground my body and soul to be able to remind myself.
They all survived without me before,
No matter how important I was in my story
Their’s would all still survive without me.

“No matter how important I was in my story
Their’s would all still survive without me.”

@tozandothersaltywords

I walked back to myself in that moment
Looking sheepish I smiled apologetically.
I embraced myself with all that love
And I cried with relief
Knowing once more
I was safe.

@tozandothersaltywords

Enough

And then she found her way,
not because she knew where she was going,
but because she slowly allowed herself to fall in love with the person she was.
And that was enough.

“She slowly allowed herself to fall in love with the person she was.

And that was enough.”

@tozandothersaltywords 

The journey included getting lost,  
it showed her twists and turns she hadn’t anticipated. Her horse blinds of the one track life she had anticipated were ripped off.

“But then she realised she was her own compass.”

@tozandothersaltywords 

She felt lost, unplanned and as if she lacked direction. But then she realised she was her own compass.  
Where was she going? She had no idea.  
Was she ready to embrace it with all of her?

Absolutely.

@tozandothersaltywords